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If only Mike Ross had raised this issue during the mayoral race

By adamg on Wed, 07/30/2014 - 9:50am
Sad Mike Ross is sad about seagulls

Mike Ross tapped out a column today that's ostensibly about the problems with the American patent system but which is really about his hatred for seagulls.

Some see the world for all its glory; I see a bunch of problems in need of tinkering. My latest annoyance is seagulls. A peaceful day on the beach can suddenly turn Hitchcock when errant sunbathers leave unattended bags of chips on their blankets. I swear I once saw a seagull unzip a handbag on Good Harbor Beach in Gloucester.

Image via the Sad Mike Ross Meme Generator, which hopefully somebody has patented.

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Comments

By Lmo on Wed, 07/30/2014 - 10:02am.

First world problems.

By anon on Wed, 07/30/2014 - 10:41am.

Nah, just first world problems for idiots, not the rest of us.

By roadman on Wed, 07/30/2014 - 12:00pm.

have ever suffered what I like to call a "Tweety attack" on your car. Seagull waste is nasty stuff (and very hard to clean off too).

By SwirlyGrrl on Wed, 07/30/2014 - 1:04pm.

I saw a woman stop at the middle of the Summer St. bridge over the channel, and start taking things out of her hand bag (trash, wrappers) and throwing it in the water!

I had no idea why she was doing this noxious thing, but the Seagulls arrived most quickly to investigate - and shit all over her nice black coat and hat.

By dpalomares on Wed, 07/30/2014 - 10:11am.

Read this with Mike Ross' voice narrating in your mind.

By anon on Wed, 07/30/2014 - 10:48am.

... as he's jogging through multiple city hoods.

By Seth on Wed, 07/30/2014 - 10:24am.

If thinking up great ideas were all one needed to do, we’d all be rich like Bill Gates and Mark Zuckerberg.

I think you're giving us all way too much credit, Mike...

By anon on Wed, 07/30/2014 - 11:28am.

"Some see the world for all its glory; I see a bunch of problems in need of tinkering."

Kind of a pessimists version of Robert Kennedy's:

"There are those who look at things the way they are, and ask why... I dream of things that never were, and ask why not?"