Two children fall or are thrown off garage near Ruggles; woman also found on ground

Ghost networks, obscure coverage rules, no "in network" providers.

It needs to stop.

My heart is torn for this family. This might have been stopped if there were proper care.

Horrible news this is the fifth homicide this year from the roof of the garage. There was one about a month ago that the information was never released to the public by the Transit Police. My prayers go out to all the victims and their loved ones.

This is such a terrible tragedy.

I remember when my own children were this age and life was so challenging and I felt despair and I thought of doing something like this. I was suicidal. I wanted everything to be over but I knew that if I left there would be no one to take care of my children. I didn't do it, because I worried something would go wrong, that I would send them off but would remain behind.

Christmas is a wonderful time of the year if you have money and/or family. If you don't have either, it's terrible. I see a lot of people on twitter and facebook mentioning the Samaritans hotline and that's fine, of course, but talking to someone on the phone for a little while doesn't buy your kids presents or give you a place to go on Christmas. The Samaritans don't give advice even, just a listening ear, and sometimes that's just what you need and sometimes, it's nothing at all. There are people I know who post warm welcoming messages on Facebook ("anyone is welcome at my home") and I know that's not true. They want to think it's true, but it's not. I know that good caring therapists are impossible to find when you are in need. I know that lots of families aren't supportive, and friends don't notice your anguish even when you say "I am in anguish" and that money doesn't appear out of nowhere even when you wish and wish and wish for it and you can watch all the movies you want about Christmas miracles but they don't happen in real life except maybe for people who aren't you.

But yet. You have to keep going anyway. You can't do what this woman has done, you can't. You can't blame her for what she did, but it's not your path. You have to keep going. You have to put your kids to bed and fall asleep beside them and keep them close. You have to wake up in the morning and figure out how to feed them and take lots of deep breaths and notice the blue in the sky and just keep going. You do the best you can, which isn't someone else's best maybe but it's your best. It's not the life you thought you'd have but it's the life you do have so again, just step by step through the day, get the kids fed, keep the kids running around, deep breaths until it's bedtime and then you should all go to bed and hold each other until morning. The sun will rise, and the spring will come eventually and the darkness will lighten - eventually. Just hang on until it does. It will come back, let's not fool ourselves, we've been down this road before, but until it does, it's deep breaths and step by step and doing the best you can in every moment - not the best ever, but the best you can in that moment. Look at your kids and their beautiful faces and keep going until you feel better. This is the worst time, the darkest time of the year. Just hang on.