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The Philip Markoff story as told in Herald adjectives

What would the Herald be without its beloved adjectives? I've been reading up on the Philip Markoff case at BostonHerald.com, and here's their basic romance novel/suspense thriller back-cover summary of the players in this sad story:

Philip Markoff is brooding, seemingly clean-cut, clean-cut, dashing, cruel, hateful, creepy and strapping. As a teen-ager, he was geeky, nerdy and gawky but also all-American.

His fiancee is doting, lovesick, beautiful and blond.

As a couple, they are young, upwardly mobile. Their wedding Web site, of course, was too-perfect, and the location they picked for their wedding is picturesque.

What about her father? He's stunned. Also, stoic. What about his grandfather? Doting. And how would one describe the mother of the fiancee's maid of honor to be? Frantic.

What are the corners of Craigslist where Markoff allegedly found his victims?
The darkest and dirtiest.

Meanwhile, murder victim Julissa Brisman was empathetic, a beauty, a Bronx beauty, stunning, wide-eyed and attractive. Her murder was, needless to say, horrifying, but the Herald needed to say it anyway. Also, it was brutal.

What sort of news is it that Markoff allegedly kept panties from his victims? Bombshell.

And what sort of mementos were they? Twisted.

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Comments

But was anybody shocked and appalled by this crime? It must surely be a heinous one.

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Yes, one neighbor was shocked, as was Markoff's Uncle Jerry.

Sadly, the Herald has yet to get anybody to admit they are appalled. The paper does recover long enough to let Michael Graham start a column with

So what does a killer look like? What kind of person commits heinous crimes?

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The Herald's Craigslist Killer reporting is just begging for an adjective tag cloud, something along the lines of the Christian Bale meltdown.

-Cosmo
http://cosmocatalano.com
World's Toughest Writer

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Smitten.

And what kind of love did the two have? Tainted.

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Damn you, Adam, now I have an earworm.

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