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Storrowers have really been stepping up their game of late
By adamg on Sat, 12/04/2021 - 9:39pm
Dr. Ed spotted the remains of a box truck sitting on Western Avenue after a very, very solid storrowing this afternoon on Soldiers Field Road. Excellent form; only missing disgorged contents, but maybe those were left on the field, um, road.
Earlier:
An artist at work with a huge audience this morning on Storrow Drive.
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So what's the owners of the
So what's the owners of the trucks that this happens to all the time doing when signing an agreement to a clueless idiot who doesn't know about Boston's failure to make a bridge higher by now? Collecting from insurance? Junking the vehicle?
We've "failed" to tear down
We've "failed" to tear down and replace a dozen bridges, at a cost of tens of millions of dollars, to accommodate vehicles that are banned from this road? Not sure I see it that way.
At this point would it not be
At this point would it not be more cost effective to put a police officer on storrow to pull over box trucks before it happens? This damages our bridges, screws up traffic, takes multiple resources to clear and clean up and probably cost the city money? This is not a rare occurrence, we're seeing this multiple times a week. If we pull over and fine these drivers before they wreck it can make the city money instead of costing it.
One is not enough
Trucks can (and unfortunately do) enter Storrow at multiple points. To be effective, you'd need a cop at every one of those points.
Have you checked
How much cops get paid around here? You’d need a lot of those $250K crossing guards to make this proposal work. Granted, they’re already doing it (or rather standing around doing nothing) at dozens of construction sites every day.
But where was I? Ah yes, defund the police.
Primo Can Opener Job!
That bridal train is something to behold!
A proper Storrowing
I agree, full marks for this one.
Question about the judging
Does the disruption to traffic factor into the scoring? This looks like a pretty creative one-- the crinking of the top is a nice tough-- but it didn't screw up the commute for thousands. So, are points taken off?
The judges will have to consider that
Up until now, the judging has focused on three things:
Artistic merit: Is the truck tipped at an unusual angle or is the roof peel particularly dramatic?
Extent of damage: Is the vehicle even drivable, are the walls of the box able to stand up on their own anymore?
Contents: How much of the truck's contents spilled all over the roadway?
But, yes, you're right: Shouldn't a storrowing at 5:15 p.m. on the Friday before a long weekend earn more points than one at 1 p.m. on a Sunday?
The judges will recess to their chambers to consider.
There should be extra points
for special artistic effects, like a King Oscar Sardines logo on the side of the truck, or a Shiva for Senate bumper sticker, or a cargo of bicycles, generously distributed all over the roadway.
Agree
Also context. The truck this week that crashed into the 11’6 clearance sign AND was photographed with bikers and pedestrians passing on the pedestrian bridge — on a picturesque rainy fall Boston day no less? Perfection.
And actually for that reason, I find that this one barely stirs my soul, despite the nice accordion can opening.
It's a cold war
I just don't trust those Brookline judges, they remind me of the Soviet judges during the Olympics.
What if … we were all judges?
UHub verified users could click a form and give points in different categories:
Technical merit (how wedged/off-kilter did it go)
Artistic merit (can-opener, Jackson Pollack-level scattering of goods/truck side panels)
Difficulty (did the driver manage to fully wedge the truck under the bridge)
Execution (did the truck cause a traffic jam and many photographs)
Then at the end of the year, we could compare scores for the annual round-up of Storrowings! Or maybe even something to use the colors for when the French Toast machine is on summer hiatus (if there's not a hurricane brewing).
one factor to screwing up the commute
is everyone slowing down to take pictures of the wreck with one hand while (i hope) holding the steering wheel with the other
Pics or eye witness testimony is required.
Otherwise could just be another Rosie Ruiz.